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    • changes.

    Saturday, February 25, 2012

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    changes.
    changing and to be change.
    all these we can't avoid
    no matter how we wanted to run away from it.

    comes the new year, and everything will change
    from individual, social, politic, economy and system
    who can stop it?

    changed hair style, changed mind set
    change address, change job?
    but please, someone do not ask any single woman
    when will the status change?

    too much to be change
    but the world still remain the same.
    not significant enough, maybe?
    Sunday, January 8, 2012

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    A photo taken at the apartment sometimes around December 2012.
    The sunset in the sky horizon that evening was awesomely stunning that i can't help but to grab my digital camera and captured the moment.

    A picture speaks thousand words. A picture also tells different stories to each different person according to their own perspective. Non to mention, a picture captured moments that we would like to freeze and look at for many many years to come. Moments that we know, will never come twice in our life.

    Since i came across the art of lomo, i knew that i am going to stick to it a very long time. Photos took with film camera are classic, old school to me. I like the yellowish, aged photo quality it produce. It doesn't matter how bad the film turn out to be but in the end, it is still an artwork for the person who shoot it.

    Maybe, i am just an old soul who seem to like most of the olden days stuff. Who loves the music by White Shoes and the Couples' Company. I love Zee Avi's songs too much that i can indulge in her music whole day long with the same playlist. Paired with coffee and book, that is like heaven on Earth to me.

    It is a new year. New resolution, i have none. I just want to be better in everything that i do, and in every character that i play in this life. Be it a sister, a friend, a lover or a teacher. And with that, let us start our 2012 with a photo to remind us how we really start it from day 1.

    Cheers to 2011, and Welcome 2012!

    out of focus

    Thursday, December 1, 2011

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    help me.
    i am out of focus continuously.
    nothing that i can do to get my self in focus again.
    why is it so hard, tell me!
    am just so frustrated.
    the best thing that i can focus is
    Christmas shopping and trip back home.

    8 months and counting...

    Monday, November 28, 2011

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    I land on my officially first job..ehm.. let say, by accident. A friend of friend told her there are vacancies in the school where she teach. So with out any hope, we just applied through email. Both of us went for the first interview but to cut the story short, i got the job and my friend got other job.


    To be honest, teaching as a school teacher is the least favourite teaching job that i would like to do. This may due to the facts that 1. i am surrounded by teachers - mum, uncles, sister and lots of friends. 2. i can be in teaching profession but as tutor or lecturer.
    But as the says, the more you dislike something, the more you will get involve in it. *Sigh! And because i've already decided earlier this year, i need to move on no matter what is the status of my postgrads study. I made myself a private school teacher much more because i need to earn money for my own cost of living.


    It has been 8 months since the day i walked blurry into the class and continue from the chapters their previous teacher left them at. Luckily for me, i got to teach all sciences subject, meaning i need to focus on science discipline only. *Relieve* I've learned a lots during these period - working environments (people and management), students and little details that make me a better person especially.


    Due to the fact that i am the substitute teacher that left the school earlier, all the job description of that teacher was hand down to me. I the one without any experience became the Form Teacher, Head of Kadet Bomba, the penilai PEKA and all sort of things that i need to comprehend in no time. My class is not the best class in the school but towards the end of year, right after their PMR, i saw their tr    ue colours. Characters that can be nurture, guide and mentored to be a good person in the future. Yes, they may be some rich spoiled kids; they have all the latest gadgets but most of them do not have time spend with their family. For them life is at school, with their friends.


    As the academic year ended last 2 weeks, i would like to put the mem    ory here as a reference in the future, for me to look and ponder upon.




    merdeka day celebrations with the kids

    when i was once a little girl......

    Monday, November 7, 2011

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    Que Sera Sera, the song that i used to sing when i was a little girl.     Our curiousity for our future was so massive when we were small. Not to say that we are not curious about our future now in our adulthood. Just that to recalled back all our innocent dreams and predictions, and compare it to what we have now... irony, funny or amusing for some.

    It is just that, what we have and how we live now is far too much different from what we ever dream of, for me at least. For example, i should have finish my MSc in 3 years time the most. But to date, almost 5 years but still the end is very much blur to me. I pray earnestly that this chapter will end soon. This mean my dream for PhD will have to be on hold for don't know how long.

    I am a person with only a few close friends. Cause the quality is more important than the quantity. My best friend, D, and i used to day dream a lotss during our class. Yes, we are the golden pair in the class. Every single teacher that taught us know how talkative we are despite the fact that we sit together, live in the same place together but our chattering is a never ending business :D

    We imagined how life would be when we are 27... oppss.. that is NOW. I am still nowhere that i can be proud of. But as for D, a chapter of her life is started at 27. A happy married woman she is now. I am happy for you, dear friend.

    As for yours truly here... Let time decide everything.

    Cheers and have a good school holiday to those teachers!

    i remember...

    Sunday, September 18, 2011

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    yes.. i remember
    but what good does it bring
    when it's only me who seem to care

    no.. i can't forget
    but i pretend to
    so that it will past by briefly...

    yes.. it is just another normal day
    have cups of coffee and
    some stupid senseless shows

    go out to shake some thoughts
    but nothing will do
    so i guess....

    today is not the day that
    i really want to remember.

    hari hari yang berlalu

    Sunday, September 11, 2011

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    hari hari yang berlalu, terasa seperti hembusan angin lalu
    tiada terasa kehadirannya.

    hari hari ku lewati, seakan tiada beza
    hari bekerja atau hari minggu.

    hari hari yang berlalu, penuh dengan rutin.
    rutin yang teramat biasa.

    dunia pelajaran ada nampak sekelumit sinar harapan,
    moganya semakin besar harapan untuk menyelesaikan semua yang
    sudah terlalu lama tertangguh.

    alam kerja.. semakin sibuk semakin terbeban.
    penipuan di depan mata, muslihat di tepi telinga.
    butakan mata, pekak kan telinga.

    dunia ku... seperti kurang nya rasa..
    tawar dan hambar..
    yang dihiasi kadang kala dengan
    merenung masa depan yang belum pasti.

    hari hari yang berlalu...
    gagahkan juga untuk berjuang.
    walau kesabaran di hujung minda
    jiwa kecamuk, hati meronta.
    biarkan saja.... hari ku berlalu ....