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  • When you are working for your passion, it's not just job anymore

    Friday, November 1, 2013

    I can't believe how fast time flies. It's 1st November, 2 more months for a brand new year!
    What an eventful year it is. Relocating again to a quiet colonial town which is around 3-4 hours drive from kl. Taiping, true to its name, is a very serene and peaceful town. Just like my hometown, it's describe as the best place to raise kids and paradises for pensioners.
    The main reason why I was moving here is because I was placed in a high need school at Changkat Jering - another smaller town nearby.
    I am a teacher, a fellow with teach for Malaysia - a nonprofit organization focusing on ending education inequity in Malaysia.  This program is a two years full commitment fellowship, and presented as a leadership development program. No, no...you are reading it wrong. A teacher is not only a leader but also a long list of non teaching roles.
    As what school does at the end of year, we finished our end of year exam last Wednesday. I am beyond nervous and anxious, marking my students papers. The results are not bad, average but I still believe that they can do better. They just haven't reach their full potential, yet.
    Put aside the academic performances, I can see that my students are becoming more confident now in the classroom or outside, they are more interested in learning compared  to early in the year. What I see lacking are goals and determination determination. I can't fully blame them as they are deprived of role models, access to a lot of important stuff and teachers who settled easily for what they saw in the kids literally, but not that prevcious gems hiding underneath their skins.
    My kids, I have not try hard enough for you all this year. But we still have one more year to polish your graphite and turn into diamond. But you, you need to give your all and your very best.

    Luahan rasa berbagai baur

    Monday, August 19, 2013
    Ruang dan masa, dua elemen terpenting 
    untuk memulih dan dipulihkan; 
    hati yang terluka, persahabatan yang tercalar, 
    bahkan persaudaraang yang renggang. 

    Ruang dan masa
    mendekatkan para hati yang jauh, 
    patah tumbuh hilang berganti, 
    semua dalam kiraan ruang dan masa. 

    Rutin dan pekerjaan, 
    adakah pekerjaan itu satu rutin? 
    Atau rutin kah pekerjaan itu 
    jika ia sesuatu yang digemari? 

    Salahkah untuk menghidupkan rutin
    yang bisa membikin hati senang, 
    serta hidup penuh makna? 
    Biarpun ia hanyalah, rutin. 

    Sunyi dan sepi 
    di kala semua bunyi menjauhi, 
    ditinggalkan bersama sekalian 
    alam cakerawala. 

    Sunyi dan sepi, 
    biarpun hiruk pikuk kota 
    hinggap berdesing di cuping telinga, 
    hati kah yang sepi? 

    Lihat ruang sekeliling mu, 
    amatilah masa yang diberikan, 
    hidupkan pekerjaan mu, 
    serta indahkan rutin. 

    Padamkan sunyi dan sepi 
    dari hati mu, 
    dengan kenangan memori 
    yang terpahat kekal. 

    bukan satu kesilapan

    Sunday, May 19, 2013

    Alkisah bagaimana sepatah ayat luahan kata daripada seorang ibu meninggalkan kesan mendalam.  

    Segala keputusan tentang hidup yang dibuat ini bukan satu kesilapan. 

    Di mana keberadaan kini bukan satu penyesalan tetapi satu cabaran. 

    Ya, kehidupan yang jauh dari apa yang disangka serta dirancang. 

    Bukan wang ringgit atau nilai pekerjaan itu yang dihitung, 

    tetapi berapa nilainya pekerjaan  berkenaan dalam masyarakat. 

    Bukan kerja senang dan mudah yang dicari, tetapi pengalaman mahal 

    dan peluang yang datang sekali dalam seumur hidup. 

    Mungkin si ibu tidak mengerti walaupun hakikatnya

    aliran pekerjaan kita sama tapi hasrat kita mungkin berbeda. 

    Ya, pada pandangan mata orang luar mungkin semua ini satu kesilapan dan kebodohon 

    Tetapi empunya diri menegaskan ini semua bukan satu kesilapan 

    dan tidak pernah akan menyesal. 

    Biarlah mereka dengan keputusan mereka dan keselesaan mereka. 

    Dan biarkan aku di sini dengan cabaran yang mendewasakan kehidupan, 

    mengentalkan semangat, pembuka mata dan minda. 

    Peluang datang dan pergi, singgahnya tidak akan kembali. 

    Apa guna hidup seribu tahun, jika hidup tidak memberi makna kepada 

    mereka yang amat memerlukan. 

    those who can, write the future

    Monday, February 18, 2013

    How do you feel looking back at your previous life? 
    Looking back at how that particular job was so easy and fun. 
    At how life as a students, your worries were only assignments and exam.
    Looking back  at how life was before you made a decision that makes you, you, NOW? 

    Or do you always dream of the future? 
    Thinking about 1001 possibilities of the 'what if?' 
    What if I went to Graduate School instead of working life? 
    What if I studied Economy instead of  Science? 
    What if I never say yes to you? 
    What if I this, what if I that.......... 

    I look back at few major decisions I have made these few years, 
    there were no regret because with each of the decision,
    I have gained more experiences, insight and new perspective on life.

    Met more friends at my first work place, friends who are understanding and supportive. 
    Realize that I might have the natural talent to teach. 
    Leave my first job, join a greater cause. 
    A cause to end the education inequity in Malaysia. 

    Everyone dreams of changing our education system 
    They rant, they complaint, they finger pointed people, 
    but.... do you really put yourself in the teachers' shoes? 
    Or even the students' needs? 

    Yes, everyone can dream of a better future, 
    but those who can, WRITE THE FUTURE. 
     And those are the fellows of Teach For Malaysia.

    wonderful life :)

    Sunday, February 17, 2013

    almost one year hiatus. there is nothing to worry, i am still alive.
    in fact, life has been even more wonderful day by day. 

    i promise i will be back here, soon. i will rant on my current life, 
    to keep record on my dream for the kids, to vent out my anger 
    and frustration, to cherish every moments worth remembering.

    there is a major change in life, since the last post. 
    something that make me move once more from a place that is 
    almost my second hometown. 

    but i guaranteed that these two years will be a life changing years
    and i hope, you will endure it will me. 

    new nest

    Friday, March 16, 2012
    I moved to the new (rented) house last Monday. Obviously, it is one of my favourite nest so far. The apartment is just nice with its slightly yellow paint. Not to mention the gorgeous big build in wardrobe! I saved a lot of bucks and spaces with wardrobe that hugeeee.. Ngee, hopefully that won't give a reason for me to buy more clothes in the future.

    Besides the wardrobe, there is the kitchen cabinet that is very convenient to hide everything in the kitchen. But, sadly... we have yet to buy the stove and the gas. Never mind, a rice cooker will be just fine. Don't tell me you never fry chicken or sausage or egg with a rice cooker? It's called College's Student Survival Skill :)

    Mostly, this new move is something that bring comfort with the private space compare to previous rented apartment (with other housemates). Fridge is waiting to be pick up from its place, TV is still under consideration. Now, the excitement is killed by the fact that ---i still have almost 10 boxes in the old house, waiting to be moved. There are one computer table, 2 racks and maybe 2 boxes of stuff. *Moving house is a tiring process, and i have to go through it twice within a year! My oh my, i do hope the next time that i need to move, is to my own house.

    So much of my new nest, but there is only ONE MISSION POSSIBLE task to achieve now.Which is to learn to drive, again! The fast moving cars and the numbers of cars on the road scared me to the bone.. And to drive in Subang and Puchong, these are totally a hell of traffic *sigh..

    Wish me luck then.

    some bugs that got into my head

    Sunday, February 26, 2012


    something bugging my mind but i don't know what things.
    and i think, it is more than one type of bug. they all creep into my mind, bite deeper each passing day, leaving lots of blank spaces that need to be rethink, decision making to be made.

    conversation with myself is not helping, and i don't think talking these matters with some other people will help too. nahh, best keep in locked inside that secret hidden part of the brain.

    and yeah, bugs are winning until i found the suitable pesticide for them.

    #it's a rainy Sunday night. surprisingly, i do not have the Monday blues. Just that, the feeling is a bit iggy. don't ask me why coz i really don't know.